Getting thrown off course has many wonderful repercussions.
Finding a new level of functioning seems to be dependant upon seeing the current direction is not leading where you had hoped, and altering your course based on your new data.
Possibly many folks look for answers, and then base their long term course, goals, and “Life methodology” on those one time answers. I suspect if I were to ask a person what their beliefs are, the beliefs would fall in line with their practised course in life.
Now Now Now means that the course is always current, based on current data.
Where is this coming from?
This morning, I woke up… well actually it was a full night simmering thing…..
I found I had lost my sense of “currentness” or “Nowness” and started to search to find the cause of it.
The cause was exactly that….. it was a loss of the presence of Nowness… not so much a loss of direction, but falling out of contact with Nowness. And a falling into mental ruminations on my life circumstances.
(This could very well be the root of a sense of emptiness; lack of direction and searching which so many of us feel at least some point in our lives.)
So what is Nowness?… to me, i mean.
Lets look at what creates that sense of Nowness.
First and foremost, it is the fact that I am aware of ME, or THIS, in this current moment…. and what defines that sense of ME or THIS in this current moment?
It is my physical location, my physical circumstances, my skin, eyes, nose, ears, mouth all informing me and giving me a sense of location…. location in time and place.
So, in that aspect, “I” am a physical being, with a set DNA body, which changes (within its set parameters) over time.
THis DNA body, is like all other physical forms…. it is oceanic awareness in a concentrated bodily form…. concentrated in physical form…. it is physical form which is formed from oceanic awareness.
Spoken in another way, “I” am an oceanic awareness arising from that concentrated body point.
The “individual” nature of this sensation/awareness concentrated body point(in one place at one time), Is the basis for everything called “ME”.
We complain about being spirits trapped in physical form, but this is a wrong concept.
It is ONLY because of our physical form that we are able to experience ANYTHING other than oceanic experiencing of awareness (like water washing around in an ocean… no front, no rear, no up, no down) ….. IT is the POINT FORM existence which gives the ability to have POINT AWARENESS (which is NOW NOW NOW). So this is why the Zen folks say “this life is priceless… don’t waste one moment!”…. we are only in this body one time, and wasting the opportunity is truly a waste indeed!
It is only that in this limited life, in this fixed form body, that there is an “I” to experience ANYTHING in solid form… so to speak ….
“I” is the experience of a focused, located form…
Likewise, this is the reason why attributing an “I” or a personhood to the oceanic awareness misses the point.
We arise from oceanic awareness, do a short life of point form experiencing “I”, and then return to the oceanic awareness. That is the nature of this “existence”.
If we recognize that this “I” is what it is, and root ourselves in its being a impermanent state, we experience the fullness of oceanic awareness within this point form. If we get lost in a sense of separateness, we experience emptiness…. but that sense of emptiness is simply a call back to NOW NOW NOW……. in order to switch from a sense of emptiness to an experiencing of fullness, we simply need to come back to our center…. come back to NOW.
Nothing else fills the void we sense inside our hearts ….. and this is the culmination of the search which started the first time I felt empty, and began searching for something to fill that void.
So, for this spring morning, here in Quesnel, this experiencing “I” called Gerry knows direction and knows this experiencing called Now Now Now, simply because “I” root myself in that experiencing… otherwise “I” lives in a world of ruminating, reminiscing, mind wandering…. and that leads nowhere.
Also, doing truly seems to be what ties the awareness into a satisfying experience.
Once this switch is flipped, and we gradually learn how to flip the switch at will, we can begin to watch life and to be free and play in our “personal research project”.
PS….. Here is something “I” found out today in my research…..
Exercise…. or body movement, seems to turn on the metabolism, as well as kicking in the immune system….. simply by burning through the bodies resources…… so living a stagnant life brings stagnance… and like water, once it begins flowing, the stagnance is gone…. just that simple.
What is living in NOW?
Living in NOW begins with the simple act of bringing oneself back to where the body and the mind are in one place….. over and over again…. a bringing back and bringing back until the practice becomes a continuous flow…. So on the other hand, practices like turning things over and over in our mind (ruminating) , and having our awareness fall out of contact with our bodily reality, worrying, manipulating things to get what we want, are all practices which pull us away from NOW, and leave us with a sense of emptiness and loneliness…. feeling orphaned.
Once a person begins the practice of bringing ones “self” back to where the body and mind are in one place experiencing NOW NOW NOW, hindrances to taht process will begin to become obvious…… these hindrances are the things which we have allowed to drag us into ruminations and out of unified body/mind awareness. Although these hindrances have arisen from our emotional reactions to life’s circumstances, they must be resolved using some form of self-inquiry, so they can be absorbed back into our unified body/mind awareness. As this process of self-inquiry progresses, the hindrances to living in inner peace decrease, and our experiencing of NOW NOW NOW grows and strengthens.
All it requires is diligence.